Horsey Therapist

Saturday, September 15, 2007

I am grateful

I am grateful to have no broken bones.

I am grateful I did not blame the horse.

I wish like anything that I would follow my own advice.

Just yesterday I wrote a friend reminding her to keep an eye on being on the wrong side of a horse. What I meant by that was if you are standing next to a more fearful horse and beyond that horse is a more assertive horse, the more fearful one may collide with you while getting away from the more assertive horse.

Basic message: keep an eye on what is going on at all times.

I failed to do that today. OUCH!

The circumstances were a little different. I was letting horses out from one paddock into another paddock. Kacee went first and Rusty followed but stopped. What I failed to adequately register was that Bo was next in line for coming through the gate. When I touched Rusty to ask him to keep moving, he kicked. He kicked me. So fast I still cannot fathom that I have two separate injuries. What would I do differently next time? CHECK IN WITH EYE CONTACT BEFORE GETTING CLOSE ENOUGH TO TOUCH HIM.

I literally howled for about three minutes once I caught my breath, before I could move. I was assessing while I howled that I could indeed take deep breaths. No ribs broken. Bo and Sofia were concerned and hung out near me. Rusty and Kacee have weathered my emotions before and hardly looked up from the hay crib.

After I finished what I needed to do with the horses and went inside, I started shaking uncontrollably. And crying. And more howling. Incredible what the body will do when given permission. I let go of my thoughts about what happened and let my body have its say.

Soon enough I took Arnica, applied Traumeel, iced the injuries, palpated them, phoned RNB to tell him we would not be dancing this evening, and after more shaking and tears, bundled up in a down comforter and fell asleep.

Please, please, please -- pay attention when you are around horses.

I am so incredibly grateful I have no broken bones. Yes, this has made me change my plans for the day and perhaps for another few days, but I feel better than I did at noon, empty emotionally and solid though hurting physically.


At 15 September, 2007 20:03, Blogger fourwinds said...

OW! I'm so sorry you got hurt!! Sending healing thoughts your way...

At 16 September, 2007 09:02, Blogger LJB said...

Thank you! I appreciate all the healing help I can get!

I'm amazed what a different experience this is, being right there inside my body with the pain instead of being frightened and at odds with and removed from the actual experience like in the past.

This would have been a great week for riding though -- some perfect fall weather! Oh well, there will be more.

At 21 September, 2007 07:31, Blogger Pam said...

Sorry to hear about your accident. It sure helps the "old hands" amoung us remember to be very aware of what is going on. Hope you are mending well.

At 21 September, 2007 08:03, Blogger LJB said...

Thank you, Pam. I was so tempted not to write about getting hurt, about not paying attention, and all that. But it's my truth and no sense in hiding that. I do fail to pay attention at times and darn if I don't get the consequences just about every time! Argh. But my behavior has changed, and I am more watchful now. We shall see if my awareness remains this keen after I'm all healed up!

At 22 September, 2007 06:44, Blogger ELL said...

Oh God LJB! That sucks. There is so much (pain for one thing) but emotion tied up in an incident likt that. It's hard not to personalize it. I've been there. And then there is the humiliation factor. I'm feeling for you! Oh and by the way, the anger is justified--but the hard part is to be able to respond fast enough in the instant and nail them appropriately. I managed it once and my "mr. loose canons for heels" never forgot to look for my proximity first before letting loose again.

At 22 September, 2007 07:51, Blogger LJB said...

ELL - thanks for your concern and understanding. I want to clarify, part of what I was grateful about was not blaming the horse. He was simply being himself in the situation, and in the past I would have smacked him, yelled at him, been mad for days. He kicked at his herd mate with whom he was already squabbling. He would have no idea why I was punishing him for defending himself in his horsey way. I suspect some people have a hard time undertanding or accepting my point of view about this, but it is what feels right and with integrity to my beliefs. If he had seen me and kicked me intentionally -- well, he might be dog food by now! There is a fine line I walk with my horses where I want them to be horses without fear. I want their attention when I ask for it, but I don't want them feeling the need to keep track of me all the time. And that goes for ground work and riding time. It was my error in judgment for not asking for his attention as well as not noting his mood and where his attention was. I cannot be angry at him for that. I'm glad to hear that your choice of dealing with a kicking horse has worked out well for you. Safety is, in my opinion, one of the highest guiding values!


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